Fanboys Destroy Spider-man Weekend
Cable television has been littered with ads for the Web Slinger Weekends at Target, Walmart and Toys R Us, so I suppose I should have anticipated the fanboy reaction even before my wife and I decided to check out the spider-offerings at our local Target (our sad little home town can’t even support a Toys R Us, and we won’t darken the door of a Walmart). I’m naïve, I suppose; I actually thought there would be SOMETHING left on the shelves. Unfortunately, that was not the case, as clearly the snot-slinging, zit-popping armies of mint-condition spider-groupies must have descended on the store right as it opened. At most, I wanted to pick up maybe one toy (a black-outfitted Spidey for my office), so it wasn’t all that crushing a moment for me. Instead, I started thinking about all of the kids who were excited about picking up the new Spider-man toys, only to find that all of them were already gone before even 10am. I’m for a free market economy and all, but don’t you think the store managers could have put the kibosh on the uber-geeks who bought the entire shipment?
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Honestly, there are only two ways to curtail this nirod activity.
1: Retailers have to stock so much product that it’s inconceivable that they would ever run out, even if all the scalpers from the alamo showed up.
2: STOP FREAKING BUYING S**T FROM THESE SCALPERS, PEOPLE!!!!!
Number one isn’t going to happen. No toy company in it’s right mind would over-produce anything. Our only hope is ourselves, as in so many other problems the world faces. *sigh* Look, it might sound like it’d be difficult, but next time you wanna buy something so badly your uvula hurts, just say no, wait a month, and then try explaining to yourself why you wanted it in the first place. Really. It works. I promise. Really.